Last weekend I had the fortunate experience to visit old faces in Cambridge and New York. Being in New England was one of the most refreshing times I've had in a long time. A locus for intellectuals... who have a mutual and strangely surreal dynamic that is not cutthroat, but rather communal vision to see each other succeed. I was a heavenly experience, in every sense of the word. I haven't felt more at home within a community...
And now I'm back in Chicago, and I can't shake this feeling...rather lack of feeling...that I'm missing this"Candide"-like optimism I'm supposed to have as a believer in God's authority in all things in this world. In Cambridge, I thought the world was my oyster! Ready to tackle my life. And now here, I must make it a point to make objective insights in my life of ways He attempts to weave His will in my life... how (a single example) unique it is for a person of my educational and socio-economic background to be working as an EMT for example... and I don't just believe, I KNOW Good has placed me on this path... yet why am I still unhappy?
Perhaps it boils down to affirmation? Being confirmed by my peers? Should I try to be more relational? Or do I make myself to vulnerable too quickly?
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